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Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Very Personal

Okay so I'm about to get EXTREMELY personal with you guys. I'm doing this because I'm going through a bit of a rough draft(severe understatement) and I seem to be at a mental roadblock on how to proceed. I've broken up with my boyfriend of almost 3 years about 3 weeks ago and i'm struggling to say the least. I've heard the "distract yourself" and "find an in between guy" and "delete all memories" which I understand all of but none of them are that simple. I mean people we are talking almost 3 years. He's been there through my entire college career, family gatherings, family issues, milestone birthday. I mean he was a part of my life for a very long time. So I'm going to post a recent conversation between him and I and maybe you guys can offer up some insight or advice on how to proceed because I must say I have never been in a position like this before.

Warning: I wasn't kidding when I said it was personal. This is solely about me and has no "bigger picture" or relevance to anyone other than me. I'm being completely selfish and hitting all you strangers up for outside advice. Don't say I didn't warn you

ME: how do you do it? be fine after all the crap? I mean did it/does the break up affect you? How did you/are you moving on? Forgetting about me and us? or if not forgetting then not letting it affect your life? I need help and who knows how to get over "us" better then the other half of "us"


HIM: who said i have one? two i havent. but i try not thinking about it. i let you be. i try not to get drawn into the message u send. i just move on cuz thats what i have to do. not intentionally but its just something i have to do, weather ur here or not. i cant stay stuck on what weve had and been thru and not move on cuz of that. see i didnt have to reply to this. it wouldnt of affected me.
but at the end of the day i think of us sometimes. it is what it is now. before it would of beem hard but now its like damn... we've been on some other shyt and it wasnt good. im not gettin into details. but its not something i can help u on ya know? i could be like fuck u and not reply after the last situation we got into but it isnt worth it. im just moving on. weather ur here or not. i love you but what weve been recently getting into wasnt living for me.
and u know that it wasnt all good. we couldnt even get along properly after being broken up. the situation isnt something u can prepare for. its like you do what u gotta do. if ur stuck on not knowing what to do or u dont know what to do then its like... i dunno. im probably not the best person to get advice about this situation or help. im sry.

ME:
thanx 4 answering me. i just don't know how you do that. just not think about it or just say to urself well it didn't work movin on... how is it so simple. but anyway thanx again. i would say ttyl but i suppose not huh. bye

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